Written By: KIM BRUMMELL

Written By:  KIM BRUMMELL
Suavv Magazine interview Feb. 2011 edition (click on the picture above)

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

SEX ADDICTION....



Are we addicted to sex? Everywhere you turn for a hot news story, sex appears to sell. Many are hooked on the little three - letter word but those three letters are as big as the titanic. Can you really live without it? How long can you go without having sex? What makes sex good for you?

Sex leads to marriage. Sex leads to divorce. Sex leads to losing a job or prominent position when caught in the act. Sex, sex, sex! From pro-golfer Tiger Woods (pictured above),who has the biggest international sex scandal right now, sex is not a thing of the past.

Let's face it. Sex makes you feel worthiness, fulfilled, loved, energetic and happy. It also boost your ego and pride to get that one hot man or woman. Sex has such a strong urge, cheating is also attached to its title in relationships. The need to have more and more also contributes to addiction.





Famous people aren't strangers to sex scandals. Sex is a need to control, a desire of power and dominance for the fortunate. With money and power, the more you get, the more you want. Former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer (pictured above) resigned over a sex-prostitution scandal in 2009 over his mistress (pictured left).

I can personally go months without sex. I'm not saying it's easy. Being in the military, deploying and so forth, you discipline your sex drive if you want to. For those who have been incarcerated, it should be the same way. It starts with the ability to train the mentality to say "no" to temptation which can be very, very hard. To me, what makes sex good depends on each individual person. A nice ass, lips, chest or just a sexy walk may reel me in. That's called "swagger" in the world of hip-hop. To simply carry yourself as a take charge person is sexy! The simple things such as strong eye contact can speak to your soul and make your jaws drop.

How do you know if you are a sex addict? How about use some common sense. You have a relationship with an attractive person who is sexually active with you. Still, there is an urge to get the next hottie in the club or the one working out in the gym. Paying to have sex with someone you don't know, escort services when you have a mate at home can all be signs of an addiction. One sex partner after another and another is a red flag. Then there is the online porn, XXX movies in the store that contribute to your every sexual desire.




We are often reminded on the radio airwaves of the strip clubs. Strip clubs can be addictive. It's like gambling. The more you spend, the more you hope to get and see. You risk it all. It's like a crack addict with a habit. You need that fix to keep getting "high". Over the years, there has been an increase of women going to the strip clubs. I guess, "curiosity kills the cat". The biggest influence when it comes to sexual gratification is "peer pressure".

If we aren't getting enough from the opposite sex, same-sex relationships may come into play also. We've heard a lot of talk about the down-low brother. It's plenty of down-low sisters also. Trust me, I know. Us women tend to be more foxy and witty with our biz. We are more concerned about how we air our dirty laundry compared to men. Too many men carry the egotistical approach with "it's a man's world" attitude.

In the meantime, safe sex is the best sex.

DANGERS OF SEXUALITY

Ex- boyfriend of young woman murders her and shoots her lesbian lover. Video clip is below.



Sexual preference has been a controversial issue for some time. Who you choose as a sex partner isn't anyone's business. What you choose and how you go about getting that mate, makes all the difference in the world. Being beyond the norm brings forth much mediocracy.



Their have been best-selling books published on down-low men. This is another term for being gay or bi-sexual. Many of them have the swagger, street-strut, b-boy style and muscles that say, "come and get some". Women often fall for those type of men, along with them being educated or bearing a sense of security.



Getting caught up doing the nasty is a down low lover's worst nightmare. The verdict of former Pastor Robert Reaves was based on a first-degree murder conviction in Raleigh, N.C. Reaves was convicted of killing Latrese Curtis, a North Carolina Central University student in Durham, N.C. Why? According to court records, he wanted the same man as Curtis. I guess she was blocking his touchdown pass that he wanted to complete for the big one! As a Pastor, you should know, "you reap what you sow".



The international case in Italy involving U.S. native Amanda Knox garnered major media attention. She was an exchange student studying in Italy. Meridith Kercher was Knox's roommate. Her throat was cut in a drug-sex orgy game gone bad. This is the prosecution's version of events. This is a prosecutor who is known for his own form of corruption. He should have never been allowed to prosecute this case. Knox's boyfriend was also charged with first-degree murder. One other man has been convicted and sentenced already to 30 years. The outcome of this case, "guilty" verdicts for both Knox and her former boyfriend. My personal opinion, I think Amanda Knox is "innocent".

Being bi-sexual, gay or taking a walk on the wild side is a tough life-style to live. The discrimination, lack of equal rights and slander can be depressing. Many people are "homophobic". Others can care less of sexual orientation if you respect them. Let's not make it hard for everybody.

The Bible recognizes marriage as between man and woman. What happened to the respect for the highest law of the land? Legislature has allowed same-sex marriage in some states. This angers citizens, hetereosexuals and anti-gay activists. If you want to get your freak on, by all means, do it! Respect others and set limitations for yourself. Don't expect to be allowed to ruin lives being "lust demons".